Kelsey+Daggett+6-E.L.

Hey Drake student Kelsey! Whats up! I am a Junior at Roosevelt and I love my school. I am on the volleyball team in my school and I spend my free time chilling out with my friends. I am interested in art and literature and I am actually very interested in writing. I'm not sure if a career in writing is what I am really looking for, but my writing skills are definately something that I need improve on. Its not that I am uninterested in writing, but I feel like it just might not be something I'm not good enough at to make a significant career goal or something like that. To be honest, I have no idea what my future holds, and what I would like to be doing as an adult. Whatever it is, I wouldnt know yet. I can't really be sure what my strengths are in my own writing, but I think I do pretty well organizing my writing and structuring my points and sentences. However, I feel my vocabulary is lacking and it impacts my writing but also I am not very good with making a point in my writing. My sentences tend to lack clarity leaving whoever reads them in confusion. I'm looking forward to receiving feedback from you on my writing although usually I prefer a small number of people to read it.. I feel like I probably have a lot to learn from you. Thanks so much for helping me out! I look forward to meeting with you and also getting know you.
 * Letters of Introduction ( **due 01.21.11 **) **

Hey Ellen! It’s great to hear from you and I’m glad that we’ve gotten partnered up. I’m a senior at Drake University where I will be graduating with a degree in Creative Advertising and English. I am also very interesting in art and literature. My Grandpa was a professional artist, my mother is an art teacher even my father is very crafty. I do hope that I can find a career in copyrighting, which is essentially writing copy for advertisements.

So, what we are doing here is that I am to be a sounding board for you and give you advice to help give feedback on your writing. Don’t be nervous at all. I really don’t like sharing my writing with that many people either, but I want you to feel comfortable with me. I want to help you as much as I can and as much as you want me to. I will definitely make sure to look out for word choice and confusing areas.

I’m glad that I get the chance to help you, work with you and get to you know. It’s exciting and exhilarating, so thank you for giving me the chance to work along side you and I hope I can help you in some way or another.

Sounds awesome! I can't wait to get started!

 306� due 01.28.11 **) ** if you are reading this right now, im not done but im going to finnish it at home. k While most people don't consider the word for any more than its political meaning, a very considerable element to it is the nature of it's meaning. To plainly explain it, deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment of retribution. However, one should also consider the nature of this term to be either violent or nonviolent in the definition, usage, and modern meaning. Deterrence has a flat out meaning that can be explained using a dictionary, but it also has aplications that require a specific and categorized meaning to the word. In a military sense, detterence is used as a violent tactic in warfare. It includes greater weapons, often nuclear, as an attempt to dicourage an attack from lesser forces. However in the poilitical sense of the word, detterence apparenly occurs apparenly when a criminal abandons their plans for criminal actions because of fear of punishment, often the death penalty. In both cases however, the final punishement of fear is death. In the cases of criminal behavior, subjects are expected to be fearful of punishment because of their actions, mostly punishment of death or imprisonment for life. The concept of fear absolutely intails punishment or a consequence of a horrifying event. The question is, is fear, or the consequence of fear, in some way realted to the basic pricipal of terrorism? Is it right to threaten someone with the consequence of death?
 * Rough Draft - Definition ( ****RHS** due 01.27.11; �305

Alright Ellen ,

You have a definite direction on where you are going with your writing which is a good start; however, the clarity is difficult to find in some of your sentences. For example: "While most people don't consider the word any more than its political meaning, a very considerable element to it is its nature." I, as a reader, think you are saying, "most people don't consider a word beyond its political meaning and that political meaning is a very considerable part of it's nature"; however, I think what you are trying to explain is, "most people don't consider a word beyond its political meaning, but words are more than just a political meaning. In fact words have a nature in and of themselves"--- My first assumption was taken from how it sounded as written, the second is what I think you are trying to say to me, the reader. Now I can be wrong on this, so don't freak out. You want this first sentence or two to clearly state where you are taking me as the reader, or what I need to know. I suggest maybe rewording that first sentence to make your point somewhat clearer while giving the reading a little bit more of a flow.

Your second paragraph is good. I like the way you write it because I can clearly read what you want to say and there is no hinderance in my understanding of it. In fact, it is very clean cut and too the point. It also has a very interesting take on deterrence and the "fear of death", which is not something I have ever thought about before. I think you make that word's definitions interesting, and that is definitely a strength in your writing.

Overall you have a fantastic start on what you want to say and where you are heading with this. I like your content so far, as well as the way you make it all very interesting through your perceptions as I mentioned before. Side Note: Do look over and proofread your writing. I find reading my writing out loud is a major help for finding little errors. (Trust me I always have more than I can ever imagine, it's just the way creative people work.) For example: "detterence apparenly occurs apparenly" is part of your second paragraph, and those are the little things, but still something to watch out for.

So, I loved reading it and I hope I helped you out!

 314� due 02.01.11 **) ** Yeah I just took my paper in a completely different directio, sorry about my indecisiveness..
 * Revision - Definition ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 01.31.11; �313

While most people don't consider the word for any more than its political meaning, it can mean much more. Politically, deterrence is a term used to describe a mothod in "deterring" criminal behavior my threat of punishment. The issue of deterrence within the capital punishment system has seemed to blot out any other meaning that the word has, in such a way that it has effectively couded the purpose of the word itself. To plainly explain it, deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution. However, since deterrence as a concept has many meanings, it is important to analyze its effectiveness within the issues that it can successfully be applied to as well as focussing on the main meaning. Deterrence has a flat out meaning that can be explained using a dictionary, but it also has applications that require a specific and categorized meaning to the word. In a military sense, detterence is used as a violent tactic in warfare. It includes greater weapons, often nuclear, as an attempt to dicourage an attack from lesser forces. However, it could also be said that we all have experienced mild detterence as children. Is all concepts of deterrence not so different form learning as a child? In a way it is essential to human development. For example, your mothers tell you to stop playing with your food at the dinner table or you will not recieve dessert. As a child with a sweet tooth, you want to make sure that you will not have to go without dessert. You don't play with your food. In both of these cases, deterrence is successful because the subject learns from principles of internal reasoning to abandon their earlier plans in order to, in the end, remain unharmed or in a preferred position. Anyone in their right mind wouldn't attack someone with nuclear bombs or disobey their mother if they withheld the true element present and working to support the effectiveness of deterrence. In the political sense of the word, detterence apparenly occurs when a criminal abandons their plans for illegal actions because of fear of punishment, often the death penalty. In the cases of criminal behavior, subjects are expected to be fearful of punishment because of their actions, mostly punishment of death or imprisonment for life. But, when properly broken down, criminal behavior would occur because of deviance by an individual, one who was increasingly violating the known norms of modern society. How can principles of internal reasoning apply, ones that are vital to the concept of deterrence, when the individual was already willing to break the norms established, in an unreasonable sequence of thought petterns? When someone is considering a horrifying, unthinkable crime, why should they stop and think of the consequences and will they stop to think anyways? So, how should we define this word? One thing is sure, we probably shouldn't define it within an issue. Deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution, not defined my any issue. Ellen-

That first sentence is still a little awkward in it's phrasing, even something like, "While most people don't consider the word for any more than it's political meaning, a very considerable element to a word is the nature of it's meaning." That helps the reader understand was 'it' is in the first sentence. Yes, a reader could refer back to the subject from the first part of the sentence, but some readers won't and it will ruin their full understanding of what you are trying to tell them.

Read some of your sentences out loud to help with structure and flow. You might possibly end up adding or subtracting some words that will add an overall smoother texture to your writing. For example: "However in the political sense of the word, detterence apparenly occurs apparenly when a criminal abandons their plans for criminal actions because of fear of punishment, often the death penalty." How could you make this sentence a little smoother? Maybe a little cleaner for the reader?

Is deterrence terrorism? It's a very strong claim masked in a question. Not a bad one, or a wrong one. I think this is something you could definitely expand further on. What makes you think that terrorism is equal to that of the consequences' of fear? What claims could you use to support that notion?

Overall you still have a really good direction. I do love the way you brought questions into the end of the paragraph. I assume that's how you were trying to sum it up. It provokes thought, so even if you don't choose to expand it, there is still a possibility of giving the reader a little something to think on after they read. That is of course, a nice way to get the reader to interact with your writing.

Keep up the good work Ellen!

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 322� due 02.04.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">FINAL - Definition ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 02.02.11; �321

While most people don't consider the word for any more than its political meaning, it can mean much more. Politically, deterrence is a term used to describe a mothod in "deterring" criminal behavior my threat of punishment. The issue of deterrence within the capital punishment system has seemed to blot out any other meaning that the word has, in such a way that it has effectively couded the purpose of the word itself. To plainly explain it, deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution. However, since deterrence as a concept has many meanings, it is important to analyze its effectiveness within the issues that it can successfully be applied to as well as focussing on the main meaning. Deterrence has a flat out meaning that can be explained using a dictionary, but it also has applications that require a specific and categorized meaning to the word. In a military sense, deterrence is used as a violent tactic in warfare. It includes greater weapons, often nuclear, as an attempt to discourage an attack from lesser forces. However, it could also be said that we all have experienced mild detterence as children. Is all concepts of deterrence not so different form learning as a child? In a way it is essential to human development. For example, your mothers tell you to stop playing with your food at the dinner table or you will not recieve dessert. As a child with a sweet tooth, you want to make sure that you will not have to go without dessert. You don't play with your food. In both of these cases, deterrence is successful because the subject learns from principles of internal reasoning to abandon their earlier plans in order to, in the end, remain unharmed or in a preferred position. Anyone in their right mind wouldn't attack someone with nuclear bombs or disobey their mother if they withheld the true element present and working to support the effectiveness of deterrence. In the political sense of the word, deterrence apparenly occurs when a criminal abandons their plans for illegal actions because of fear of punishment, often the death penalty. In the cases of criminal behavior, subjects are expected to be fearful of punishment because of their actions, mostly punishment of death or imprisonment for life. But, when properly broken down, criminal behavior would occur because of deviance by an individual, one who was increasingly violating the known norms of modern society. How can principles of internal reasoning apply, ones that are vital to the concept of deterrence, when the individual was already willing to break the norms established, in an unreasonable sequence of thought patterns? When someone is considering a horrifying, unthinkable crime, why should they stop and think of the consequences and will they stop to think anyways? So, how should we define this word? One thing is sure, we probably shouldn't define it within an issue. Deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution, not defined my any issue.

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 332� due 02.11.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">REFLECTION #1 ****<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 02.08.11; �331

1. I think that with a little help I improved on the clarity in my sentence structure and maybe some of the wording that helps the reader understand the point that I'm trying to get across. 2. I think that the positive feedback that I got from my drake partner was what helped me the most and allowed me to have confidence in what I was writing. 3. I think that I had a lot of trouble trying to focus my writing, and I also struggled with the direction of my piece. I feel even though my definition tied in with my final, that I should have carefully chosen my idea that I was more comfortable with using. I actually struggled a lot with the purpose of my piece, which should have only defined my word, but seemed to spiral out of control in a crazy sequence of my own thoughts in a panic.

Thanks again for helping me with the awesome feedback!

Ellen- Thanks for writing that piece. It was really a delight to read. It was interesting and engaging to read. I'm glad if any of my comments helped you out, and I hope that in the future I can continue to help you with whatever you need. I'm also glad to see that you have some more things that I can try and look for in your writing. It's an exciting adventure that we're on, and I can't wait to start the next writing.

Good job Ellen, wonderful job!

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 340� due 02.18.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">Rough Draft - Classification/Division ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 02.16.11; �339

I'm so sorry about the lateness of this rough draft, I had to leave for a volleyball tournament the day that this paper was assigned to leave for minnesota and today was as soon as I could get to it..

Others do not often consider the meaning of the word deterrence. To be honest, I myself have not considered the word until I was confronted with the meaning of it in terms of capital punishment. For a very broad definition, the way I see it, deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution. However, deterrece itself can be broken down into many classifications, or categories. In a disciplinary sense, many parents and teachers may use the principles of deterrence daily. Often we use it to control the actions of our chlildren and teach them how to act. For instense, you may threaten a child with a harsh punishment as a consequence for their actions. But, you do not exactly punish them right away while they are well aware of what will happen if they disobey you. This treatment is almost always successful and the process that we all may experience as we grow and learn the proper way to act in todays society. (I like where you are going with this example. Almost everyone has had to be disciplined at one time or another by their parents which makes it something relatable. Is there something that you could add here? Maybe an example of what you could threaten a child with for punishment like a spanking for leaving the yard? It might add to the overall paper.) In addition to the things that we learn from our parents, we can also learn from the people and society we live in. By experience in the world we live and work within be can be presented with positive and negative sactions that may determine our future actions. These sanctions can occur in formal and nonformal events that in a more discrete way can let anybody know when they have done something unacceptable and in a way deter them from repeating these actions. Some examples include being ignored or ridiculed. (Maybe lengthen these examples out, and actually give a mini story or example to your readers) Mild criminal behavior can also be confronted with effective deterrence that most citizens of any country have probably experienced. For example, you are looking for a parking spot on a crowded street. You see an open spot, but when you pull up you see a sign that reads, "NO PARKING $50 FINE", so you move on and find another spot. Because you do not want tobe fined fifty dollars, you have been deterred from taking the illegal spot. This type of deterrence, mild criminal deterrence is seen everyday and everybody, not in trouble with the law, lives by the standards set by it. (I like this example very much. It helps the reader understand what is something you see as a mild criminal behavior. It's interesting and adds some support to your paper.) More intense criminal deterrence includes deterring criminal behavior such as murder or assault or sexual violence with a penalty or either death or life inprisonment. While many doubt the effectiveness of the capital punishment included in criminal deterrence, many studues have been conducted to prove that it is indeed effective. And that the number of murders is less in states that include policies of capital punishent or the death penalty than those that do not practice capital punishent. It is assumes that most criminals fear the possibility of death after contemplating passionate murder scemes. However most of the offenders seem to be too crazy really care. (Where do you get your support for this? Why should I as the reader take your word that murder is less in states that have capitol punishment? Is there a way you can work in a source or help me understand where you got your informations?) Another way that deterrence is used, is in a military perspective. In a lot of cases leaders in war or generals have used certain tactics to aviod conflict that has already begun with other countries. If one country wages war on another, often country number two with threaten country number one with powerful military forces that exceed their abilities. This is to somehow strike fear into the hearts of the one country that is attemting to attack and assuring that their conflict will be resolved using violent deterrence. (This paragraph is a bit awkward. Is there a way to simplify what you say so it has more flow for the reader? I love the example, it is very prevalent in history, especially U.S. history. In fact it makes me think of the atomic bombs dropped after Pearl Harbor. Way to work in something that everyone can relate to, whether WWII or what we're in right now.)

Ellen- Don't worry about being late it's perfectly fine. I've been sick so I'm also a little bit behind as well. Anyway, Classification/Division paper here we come. I do really like where you are going with this. I like how you have things broken up and your transitions work well to keep flow throughout your paper. I enjoyed reading this and urge you just to look over some of my questions and comments. Great Job!

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 348� due 02.25.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) ** I havent had time to talk to my teacher yet, but hopefully I can meet with her to sort out the porpose that I need to look for and highlight somehow in my writing that I'm not quite seeing..
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">Revision - Classification/Division ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 02.23.11; �347

Others do not often consider the meaning of the word deterrence. To be honest, I myself have not considered the word until I was confronted with the meaning of it in terms of capital punishment. For a very broad definition, the way I see it, deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution. However, deterrece itself can be broken down into many classifications, or categories. ( I love that you are putting yourself into the paper right away. As the reader I am aware of where you are coming from and what intentions you have for this paper. Great Start!) In a disciplinary sense, many parents and teachers may use the principles of deterrence daily. Often we use it to control the actions of our chlildren and teach them how to act. For instense, you may threaten a child with a harsh punishment as a consequence for their actions. But, you do not exactly punish them right away while they are well aware of what will happen if they disobey you. For example, your mother telsl you if you do not quit pestering your older brother, you will be send straight to bed without desert, so as a result you do not pester him any longer for fear that you must go to sleep with no chocolate cake in your belly. (Good example. It really does add to the overall paper, which in turn gives the reader a easy way to connect with your words and ideas.) This treatment is almost always successful and the process that we all may experience as we grow and learn the proper way to act in todays society. (Is it the proper way to act in today's society? Who tells us that? Is it a popular notion, or a world belief that we learn a "proper" way to act in society? What are your thoughts on that?) In addition to the things that we learn from our parents, we can also learn from the people and society we live in. By experience in the world we live and work within be can be presented with positive and negative sactions that may determine our future actions. These sanctions can occur in formal and nonformal events that in a more discrete way can let anybody know when they have done something unacceptable and in a way deter them from repeating these actions. Some examples include being ignored or ridiculed. Like if you are trying to impress your boss by being funny and you tell him a joke. He doesn't seem to enjoy the joke and looks away with a strange look on his face saying nothing. This lets you know that you were in the wrong and will keep you from repeating your mistake by avoiding the awkward moment. (Good example. Many people can relate to trying to impress a boss. This could even be taken further by your boss punishing you for a thoughtless remark or joke. You made good connection here.) Mild criminal behavior can also be confronted with effective deterrence that most citizens of any country have probably experienced. For example, you are looking for a parking spot on a crowded street. You see an open spot, but when you pull up you see a sign that reads, "NO PARKING $50 FINE", so you move on and find another spot. Because you do not want to be fined fifty dollars, you have been deterred from taking the illegal spot. This type of deterrence called mild criminal deterrence, can be seen everyday by everybody, not innecessarily in trouble with the law, lives by the standards set by mild criminal dieterrence. More intense criminal deterrence includes deterring criminal behavior such as murder, assault, or sexual violence with a penalty or either death or life imprisonment. While many doubt the effectiveness of the capital punishment included in criminal deterrence, many studies have been conducted to prove that it is indeed effective. And that the number of murders is less in states that include policies of capital punishment or the death penalty than those that do not practice capital punishent. It is assumes that most criminals fear the possibility of death after contemplating passionate murder scemes. However most of the offenderswho may know right from wrong, simply do not care about the repercussions or are a little to psychopathic to care. Another way that deterrence is used, is in a military perspective. In a lot of cases leaders in war or generals have used certain tactics to avoid conflict that has already begun with other countries. If one country wages war on another, often country number two with threaten country number one with powerful military forces that exceed their abilities. This is to somehow strike fear into the hearts of the one country that is attemting to attack and assuring that their conflict will be resolved using violent deterrence. (Read back over send out loud and see if there are different words or transitional words that will help the reader clearly read what you are saying) For example, after Japan's strike on Parl Harbor during WWII, the U.S. responded by dropping atomic bombs in Hiroshima and killing many people. It made the Japanese aware of their powerful competitor so they knew not to respond with any further attacks.

First off, sorry about the late response. I was crazy busy and didn't know what our date to respond was. I hope these comments don't come to late or are too overwhelming for you in your writing process. I do think though that you are on track and well into your writing. So, overall wonderful job Ellen! I really enjoyed reading this and feel that you have put more of yourself in the paper. I enjoyed your examples and expansions on the things we talked about in class. I'm glad to see they helped. Some tidbits, just look over the questions that I posed to you in your writings. See if maybe they are something you would like to add in your paper. Also, look back over and watch mechanics for you final paper. Again, wonderful job on this revision I hope my comments help you out. <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 356� due 03.04.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">FINAL - Classification/Division ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 03.01.11; �355

Others do not often consider the meaning of the word deterrence. To be honest, I myself have not considered the word until I was confronted with the meaning of it in terms of capital punishment. For a very broad definition, the way I see it, deterrence is preventing or controlling actions by fear, especially of punishment or retribution. However, deterrece itself can be broken down into many classifications, or categories.

In a disciplinary sense, many parents and teachers may use the principles of deterrence daily. Often we use it to control the actions of our chlildren and teach them how to act. For instense, you may threaten a child with a harsh punishment as a consequence for their actions. But, you do not exactly punish them right away while they are well aware of what will happen if they disobey you. For example, your mother telsl you if you do not quit pestering your older brother, you will be send straight to bed without desert, so as a result you do not pester him any longer for fear that you must go to sleep with no chocolate cake in your belly. This treatment is almost always successful and the process that we all may experience as we grow and learn the proper way to act in today's society.

In addition to the things that we learn from our parents, we can also learn from the people and society we live in. By experience in the world we live and work within be can be presented with positive and negative sactions that may determine our future actions. These sanctions can occur in formal and nonformal events that in a more discrete way can let anybody know when they have done something unacceptable and in a way deter them from repeating these actions. Some examples include being ignored or ridiculed. Like if you are trying to impress your boss by being funny and you tell him a joke. He doesn't seem to enjoy the joke and looks away with a strange look on his face saying nothing. This lets you know that you were in the wrong and will keep you from repeating your mistake by avoiding the awkward moment.

Mild criminal behavior can also be confronted with effective deterrence that most citizens of any country have probably experienced. For example, you are looking for a parking spot on a crowded street. You see an open spot, but when you pull up you see a sign that reads, "NO PARKING $50 FINE", so you move on and find another spot. Because you do not want to be fined fifty dollars, you have been deterred from taking the illegal spot. This type of deterrence called mild criminal deterrence, can be seen everyday by everybody, not innecessarily in trouble with the law, lives by the standards set by mild criminal deterrence.

More intense criminal deterrence includes deterring criminal behavior such as murder, assault, or sexual violence with a penalty or either death or life imprisonment. While many doubt the effectiveness of the capital punishment included in criminal deterrence, many studies have been conducted to prove that it is indeed effective. And that the number of murders is less in states that include policies of capital punishment or the death penalty than those that do not practice capital punishent. It is assumes that most criminals fear the possibility of death after contemplating passionate murder scemes. However most of the offenderswho may know right from wrong, simply do not care about the repercussions or are a little to psychopathic to give a hoot what others think.

On another topic, military deterrence is also a valid subject. In a lot of cases, leaders in war or generals have used certain tactics to avoid conflict that has already begun with other countries. If one country wages war on another, often country number two with threaten country number one with powerful military forces that exceed their abilities. This is to somehow strike fear into the hearts of the one country that is attemting to attack and assuring that their conflict will be resolved using violent deterrence. For example, after Japan's strike on Parl Harbor during WWII, the U.S. responded by dropping atomic bombs in Hiroshima and killing many people. It made the Japanese aware of their powerful competitor so they knew not to respond with any further attacks.

Although when we hear the word, many topics and issues may come to our mind, deterrence should be recognized as a very broad topic that influences our lives with little limitations or boundaries. Not necessarily identifiable at first glance the principals of learning and development, social acceptence, mild and serious criminal behavior, and foreign developments rely on the principals or deterrence and somehow help to shape the world we live in today.

Ellen, I think this paper turned out beautifully. It was well written and held very relatable examples for each of your classifications. Your conclusion is a really nice way to tie up your whole topic. Overall you did a great job. There were some small mechanical errors but those are always things that can be worked on. The content of your paper through really reflected understanding and interesting insight into a usually bland and a subject usually considered to be restrictive. Good job Ellen! I can't wait to read your next paper.

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 366� due 03.25.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">REFLECTION #2 ****<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 03.22.11; �365

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 374� due 04.01.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) ** Sorry about the tardiness of my work, i was absent when my teacher gave the assignment out, im so sorry.. No problem! I've been sick this whole past week and it's been slowing my down too.
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">Rough Draft - Argument ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 03.30.11; �373

In consideration of the justification of capital punishment, one of the hottest issues that politicians and officials have struggled with is the issues of the validity of deterrence. Often people debate the issue. The question is whether or not the execution of prisoners who commit horrible crimes "deters" other criminals from committing the same actions and harming others. While some claim that capital punishment is ineffective in that sense, others believe that is help to control the amount of violent crimes that occur in certain areas of the united states that still do use capital punishment. Are there specific places that this argument has been used? Specific states? Court cases? Is it only that some think that capital punishment is ineffective or are there are reasons? Is treating violence with violence really the best method to "deterring" more violence? If it is why? Why not?

It is somewhat difficult to assess the validity of this theory because it is difficult to know the motives of entire populations of criminal and also criminal who have not yet committed any crimes. That's true it will be hard, but are there other ways to study both sides of this debate? You look at some in your previous paragraph. Is deterrence through a violent punishment effective or not? What do those that agree with yes use for reasons and vice versa? However, many statistic show that in area that still have capital punishment in use may be able to prove this theory. The number tend to confirm it because as the number of prisoners executed for extremely violent crimes rises, the number of these crimes occurring decreases. It is said that when a person know

Ellen-

You have a good start on the paper for a rough draft, but I suggest you consider looking back over the red points in the text. Think about are there solid specific examples that can help support your claims to both sides of the argument? How does deterrence and violence work together and against each other throughout your argument? They almost seem to have a close relationship with one another, but is there a point when a line gets drawn for violence? Maybe not? Maybe as a society we have no lines-no set boundaries? Also, make sure you tie things back go one another-connect your points. Are there other ways to look at this argument? Other perspectives that are just as valuable to the reader? Use these points and really think about them when you go back through your paper as well as continuing on in your revisions.

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 382� due 04.08.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">Revision (1) - Argument ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 04.05.11; �381

In consideration of the justification of capital punishment, one of the hottest issues that politicians and officials have struggled with is the issues of the validity of deterrence. Often people debate the issue. The question is whether or not the execution of prisoners who commit horrible crimes "deters" other criminals from committing the same actions and harming others. While some claim that capital punishment is ineffective in that sense, others believe that is help to control the amount of violent crimes that occur in certain areas of the united states that still do use capital punishment. They think that if criminals fear the death that will eventually come to them after committing a horrible crime, they may not decide to commit the crime, and this is why they support the death sentence. Some people believe that capital punishment is ineffective because the purpose of it is to decrease crime, however we never really seem to see any evidence of this, there for they find no way to justify an further use of violence in the penal system. (Go back to some of your last papers. In your FINAL for your classification/divison paper you use "More intense criminal deterrence includes deterring criminal behavior such as murder, assault, or sexual violence with a penalty or either death or life imprisonment. While many doubt the effectiveness of the capital punishment included in criminal deterrence, many studies have been conducted to prove that it is indeed effective. And that the number of murders is less in states that include policies of capital punishment or the death penalty than those that do not practice capital punishent. It is assumes that most criminals fear the possibility of death after contemplating passionate murder scemes. However most of the offenderswho may know right from wrong, simply do not care about the repercussions or are a little to psychopathic to give a hoot what others think." They would support sides of your arguments.

It is somewhat difficult to assess the validity of this theory because it is difficult to know the motives of entire populations of criminal and also criminal who have not yet committed any crimes. That's true it will be hard, but are there other ways to study both sides of this debate? You look at some in your previous paragraph. Is deterrence through a violent punishment effective or not? What do those that agree with yes use for reasons and vice versa? However, many statistics show that in area that still has capital punishment in use may be able to prove this theory. The numbers tend to confirm it because as the number of prisoners executed for extremely violent crimes rises, the number of these crimes occurring decreases. It is obviously understood than when a person fears the outcome of a certain action, odds are they will choose not to complete the action. (That's true, but what about the people who don't fear anything? or those like sociopaths who don't care about others because they have no conscience? Could this reasoning help those opposed to the death penalty? If those who are violent can't be deterred from their actions why waste the resources to deal with them?) When a criminal is aware that they will die shortly after being caught for murder, they decide not to murder anyone. However this simple concept is sometimes to difficult for some to grasp. Sometimes people say that it is unethical to use capital punishment as if the prisoners do not deserve death, but why do they defend the person who is going to count on getting away with murder? (Why do these oppose killing somebody? Is there a distinction between killing and murdering? Are there specific social practices that influence them like religion? personal reasons/experiences? etc.) They are obviously blinded by their own ignorance and unable to accept a reasonable concept such as this. (Are they blinded? Why? Because they have a different point of view than others or because they have an invalid argument? What is the reason behind your assumption or thought that because they don't agree with the death penalty that they are blinded? What about the mother, sister, father, or brother of the killer? Does their son, daughter, brother, or sister deserve to die too? Is it all as simple as an eye for an eye or are their complications?)

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 390� due 04.15.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) ** In consideration of the justification of capital punishment, one of the hottest issues that politicians and officials have struggled with is the issues of the validity of deterrence. Often people debate the issue. The question is whether or not the execution of prisoners who commit horrible crimes "deters" other criminals from committing the same actions and harming others. While some claim that capital punishment is ineffective in that sense, others believe that is help to control the amount of violent crimes that occur in certain areas of the united states that still do use capital punishment. They think that if criminals fear the death that will eventually come to them after committing a horrible crime, they may not decide to commit the crime, and this is why they support the death sentence. Some people believe that capital punishment is ineffective because the purpose of it is to decrease crime, however we never really seem to see any evidence of this, they also seem to further refute evidence that suggests that the death penalty is effective by masking the issue with other issues of cost.
 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">Revision (2) - Argument ( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 04.13.11; �389

It is somewhat difficult to assess the validity of this theory because it is difficult to know the motives of entire populations of criminal and also criminal who have not yet committed any crimes. However, many statistics show that in area that still has capital punishment in use may be able to prove this theory. The numbers tend to confirm it because as the number of prisoners executed for extremely violent crimes rises, the number of these crimes occurring decreases. According to the FBI,, in 2007, the murder rates in states with the death penalty were at 5.9 while the rate in states without the death penalty had a rate of 4.1, as seen on the website of the Death Penalty Information Center. It is obviously understood than when a person fears the outcome of a certain action, odds are they will choose not to complete the action. When a criminal is aware that they will die shortly after being caught for murder, they decide not to murder anyone. However this simple concept is sometimes to difficult for some to grasp. (Why if they don't fear death? I've mentioned before the idea that some people can't be deterred, and in that case, can the pro-captial punishment groups use that as a defense? Some people can't be "cured" or can't be rehabilitated into society "norms" so why not use capital punishment? As for the anti-capitol punishment side, what about all the those who were put to death but were found innocent later on down the line? Where is the justice for them? How can one's jury of peers really be 100% sure that a man is guilty?)

Many people argue that the execution of prisoners is irrelevant and unrelated to the rate of murders in states with and without the death penalty. They also argue that the cost of the death penalty protocol in the United States is much higher than the cost of maintaining a life without parole sentence. It has been estimated that the costs of the the legal processes, pre-trial, jury selection, actual trial, and incarceration costs greatly exceed the cost of the imprisonment of a single prisoner for their entire life. However, recent investigations have concluded that LWOP (life without parole) can cost anywhere from one to three million more than the execution of a prisoner. Prisoners executed will have no opportunity to harm any other prisoners, officer or guards, or ponder themselves into any harmful and dangerous outburst that could cause the system a great deal of money. (How recent were these figures? Does killing a prisoner justify the itself because they //may// harm officers or guards, or because they //may// convince themselves to do something harmful and dangerous? Does killing a prisoner come down to what it costs the state? Is it all about the monetary value or is it more about the moralistic value? In other words is killing a prisoner about money or morals?)

So, according to the evidence of modern day data collections, is is easy to see that deterrence is an way of a substantial amount of crime prevention and remains a beneficial program within the penitentiary system. Arguments that the costs overweight the effectiveness of the procedure can only mask the hard facts that capital punishment is a valid answer to the question of murder and crime prevention.

<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;"> 398� due 04.22.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **


 * <span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">REFLECTION #3 ****<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">( **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">**RHS** due 04.25.11 **<span style="font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode','Lucida Grande',sans-serif;">) **